Welcome Scaries #20
Because it's Sunday Night ☃️
Welcome Scaries is now sent on the 2nd Sunday of each month. It started because so many of us experience nervousness on Sunday nights in anticipation of the coming week and all we have to do. The intention is to offer your difficult feelings—your Scaries—kindness, instead of fighting with them, resenting them, or trying to get rid of them. This idea of befriending your feelings comes from an old story about how the Buddha invited his enemy to tea rather than trying to defeat him.
→ Read all the Sunday Scaries in the Meditation with Heart archive!
I’ve spoken to nearly a dozen friends and students over the past few days who are feeling tired. I’m not surprised because it’s December, but each of them are upset about it. They feel frustrated and impatient with themselves because they believe they should have be more energetic and be able to get more stuff done. But if you live in the Northern Hemisphere, then of course you’re tired — you’re experiencing the darkest time of the year, which affects all animals, including humans. Circadian rhythms (including sleep cycles) are disrupted, and less sunlight can cause a drop in serotonin levels, causing fatigue and depression.
Please know that if you have responsibilities that prevent you from slowing down, then simply be kind to yourself and don’t push. Be gentle and take it as easy as you can.
Until electric lights became widely used, humans slept when it was dark. So in the summer we slept less than we did in the winter. And for the weeks before and after the winter solstice, we would follow this natural wisdom and allow ourselves to rest much more and sleep for many hours and conserve our energy. I encourage you to do the same. If you’re fighting against tiredness, stop. Welcome your sleepiness and fatigue with kindness and patience. Pay loving attention to your sensations and moods. Go to bed when you're sleepy, which might be earlier than usual. Awaken when you’re ready, which might be later. And if your usual activities and social life feel overwhelming, slow down a bit until the daylight increases or you feel rested, refreshed, and steady again.
(Please know that if you have responsibilities that prevent you from doing this and from slowing down, it’s okay. Simply be kind to yourself and don’t push. Be gentle and take it as easy as you can.)
And now for our monthly positive and useful links. May they be of benefit:
→ Women’s Leadership in Buddhism: I was invited to share my experience on a panel with meditation teachers Tracy Cochran and Lama Aria Drolma at the Rubin Museum last month. You can listen to our discussion here.
→ Instructions on keeping balance after the election: Buddhist teacher Larry Rosenberg is 91 years old and has serious health issues, and he continues to practice and teach. His most recent update for his students encourages and reminds us to stay steady, be brave, and use our practice wisely:
“Many questions that have been directed to me in the past few days, are something like, “Well, where do I start?” And my answer is always the same. 'You start where you are.'“ Read more in the updates at this link. Note this is a GoFundMe page, but you don’t have to donate to read Larry’s messages. But if you have the means I hope you’ll consider it.)
→ Advice from Stressed-Out People: Artist Sólveig Eva Magnúsdóttir surveyed people experiencing burnout for a social science research project. She was so inspired by the good sense, generosity, and resilience she heard from many of them, that she shared it in an illustrated article so we all can benefit from them. My favorite is “You are not loved for your utility. You are loved for your personhood." It’s here.
→ Free CD Book Giveaway: The audio version of Navigating Grief and Loss was released last month, and the publisher sent me five copies of it on CD. But I don’t know anyone who has a compact disc player anymore! If you have one or know someone who does and would like a copy, email me and I’ll send one to you.
→ Peace is Possible: If you feel helpless or enraged at war and violence in your home, community, or in the world, don’t get discouraged or indifferent. Stay in touch with your wisdom and compassion so to bring about change and not lose hope. This week’s prayer is from Peace Pilgrim, an American renunciate who walked throughout the country for 28 years on a pilgrimage. I hope you’ll take time to say it or chant it daily to support peace within, without, and peace between us all.
Prayer for Peace in Our War-Weary World
O wonderful spirit of gentleness, touch, calm and embolden us and all people. Take from our frightened hands the bomb and the bayonet. Arm us with faith instead. Arm us with wisdom and love so that wherever we walk in whatsoever land, life will enter and not death. This we know is the will of the Universe. Amen.
Bows and Blessings, My Friends !
This is our final Sunday Scaries for 2024! Thank you for being here! I’m grateful for your support and love, and that you’re investing in your mind and heart. I wish for you to appreciate your beautiful presence and be sure to treat yourself with the same care, compassion, and interest you offer to your dearest friends and family.
May this week be easy and loving for you. May you recognize your gifts and share your blessings. May it be so!
Take it light.
Metta+++,
Kim✨
P.S. The theme for December is Learn to Delight in Giving. If you haven’t joined us yet, listen to Week 1 here.
I was just talking to Kevin this morning how out of sorts I felt for no real reason at all. Winter blues. I realized it was the slowly down I am fighting. Finding a new pace and rythym in the dark cold quiet months.
Having recently had surgery I kept thinking that’s the reason I’ve been so tired. And I’m sure it contributed to my overall fatigue. But the last couple days it’s been a different kind of tired. The kind I personally welcome, one where I don’t feel guilty about not leaving the house, and I welcome snuggling up in cozy pajamas with my little daschund name Rockie. Love the Sunday Scaries Kimberly 🙏🏻♥️