In my past two newsletters on the theme of How to Sleep, I discussed the difficulties you might have in falling asleep and how to return to sleep after waking up. But today and next week too, we’ll look at real insomnia — those nights when it’s impossible to get to sleep at all.
I don’t have chronic insomnia, but one or two nights each month I just can’t sleep. I created a Can’t Sleep Checklist which I use instead of just lying there feeling helpless — you can read it below and use it to help you create the conditions for getting to sleep too. But sometimes, no matter what you might do or how hard you try to make it happen, you may still end up awake.
I’ve learned that resisting insomnia makes the experience much worse than it needs to be. Instead letting yourself get exhausted and distressed and impatient, it’s better to surrender — to say to yourself, “This is the way it is right now” and stop tensing against your experience and relax into it. I figured this out when I remembered that an old Tibetan teacher once told me he didn’t need to sleep very much, but he did need to rest his mind. And so do you. Surrendering to insomnia means that you can change your focus from forcing yourself to sleep, to letting yourself be.
In today’s meditation I’ll guide you to surrender to what’s happening, stop trying to control everything, and just be. We’ll practice a technique I call Rest, Relax, and Let Go, to stay connected and easy in your body, mind, and heart. I find that this practice also helps me feel less depleted and exhausted the next day, and I think you will too.
This month’s meditations are for you to practice while you’re in bed, to support healthy sleep. Be sure to keep your device out of reach as you listen to them! #pressplayandputitaway
What happens when you have insomnia? Do you have any tips that help you fall asleep or feel more at ease? Please share in the comments below!
Can’t Sleep Checklist
Don’t stay awake in bed for longer than 15 minutes or so. Get up, drink a soothing non-caffeinated beverage, sit and look out the window, or read from a non-blue screen — a book, magazine, or e-reader. Stay for 20 minutes before you go back to bed.
Keep your room cool.
If sound bothers you, get some ear plugs.
If light bothers you, get an eye mask.
Be sure to follow a Pre-Sleep Routine too!
Our next live Zoom small-group meditation for members is tomorrow May 28, 9-9:30pm EST. Join us!
I’m leading an in-person Half-Day Retreat Upstate on July 11th! Please join me if you live nearby, and for my NYC friends, I hope you’ll consider taking the train to our lovely town, participating in the workshop, and enjoying all the sights! Find all the details at this link. Email me if you have questions!
If you haven’t read my books, I hope you will! You can order them wherever books are sold, including at Bookshop.org and Amazon.
Sweet dreams ‘til sunbeams find you.
Metta+++,
Kim✨
